Until I Fall
Sometimes you need a good dramatic piece of music. One that I think is amazing, and that I turn to when I need it, is "Until I Fall" by Liam Singer.
I don't remember when or how I discovered Liam Singer. He's not easy to find now - when I Google him, Google assumes I mean Liam Payne. He's got a web site, though. And there are a small number of people besides me on the web who have listened to his music, said holy shit, and decided to write about it.
What's not on the web are the lyrics to his songs. But I've been listening to "Until I Fall" a lot, writing down the lyrics I hear, and I think I finally have a solid enough transcription of every line, though there's always possibilities like the second line being "heaved inside" instead of "heaved and sighed". Those lyrics are at the end of this post.
"Until I Fall" is a beautiful, bitter, cathartic song. It's not exactly a breakup song, it's more a "Frankenstein's monster defying his creator" song, but it helps to have someone you're upset at, someone who you need to remember doesn't control you.
The first minute of the song is quiet piano chords over the sound of some piece of clockwork being unsteadily wound. Then the clockwork starts running, an arpeggio starts playing, and the tension you heard being wound up in the first minute is released as the remaining six minutes of the song, each minute more of a release than the last.
Lyrics to "Until I Fall" by Liam Singer
With a jolt I came alive
Heaved and sighed
And underneath the sheets I groaned
Let the first thing that I see
Oh, Father, please
Be the eyes of radiant God
Oh give me the truth or a lie that saves us
And give me a name to defend
The name's not what I truly am
I am stubborn, you are proud
Say it out loud
Say I've changed, and you don't like it
Been watching people through my lens
And I want to be with them
Casting coins to the great unknown
So give me the truth or a lie that seems right
And give me a name to defend
The name's not what I am
I was born in a crumbling tower
With flowers that weave through my mind
Meaningless divine
Oh well
Go to hell
Second prize
'Cause you tried
One more thing you ought to know
Before I go
Is that I only stayed by choice
All your warnings, all the fear
They never kept me here
Made me smarter than you knew
I gave you the truth or a lie that seemed right
I gave you a name to pretend
But named not what I am
I was born on a tilted axis
With flowers that weave through my mind
Meaningless divine
And so you'll wake to find me gone
And you'll go rushing to your shop
Where you'll discover all the missing things
That I used to construct this pair of wings
And sew them on to my gown
And move every muscle until they fly
And rise very slowly over the wall
To fly towards the mountains until I fall