Trans exclusion at OBX
(I sent this statement to the IFPA on November 9, 2025.)
I'm Elia Lake (IFPA #92725). I have concerns to bring up about the trans-exclusionary pinball tournament that was held by Kevin Stone at OBX. I traveled to this tournament, but did not enter it, due to the events that happened.
This is a moment when it's very important for the IFPA to take a strong stand against discrimination. As an IFPA policy update said this year: "One of the IFPA's highest priorities is to ensure that players feel welcomed and supported regardless of race, religion, gender, orientation, or ability."
At the OBX open tournament, trans players were not welcome from the start of the tournament. Becky Connell, a non-pinball-player who was the manager on site at the venue, was running the registration desk for the tournament. She chased a trans woman out of the bathroom, which is discrimination and sexual harassment. She verbally abused people at the registration desk who looked queer to her, and threatened to call the police if any other trans women used the bathroom. The police can easily destroy the lives of trans people, so this threat alone made most trans players unwilling to enter the tournament space. I was among them - I stayed in the parking lot hoping for a resolution, along with about 15 other players.
The resolution never came and I never entered the tournament. I was not going to give financial support to a transphobically-managed business (Flippers) by paying for any of their tournaments or putting coins in their machines.
The trans woman that Becky Connell sexually harassed had a panic attack outside the building, and after more trans friends arrived to help her, she drove back to her AirBnB for the rest of the day. Becky Connell was not removed from the tournament, and she was allowed to keep running the registration desk for 3 hours until her shift as the manager ended, which made it unsafe for all trans people to enter the building for 3 hours.
The TD, Kevin Stone, failed to handle this. It was his duty to address the hate crime that happened at his tournament, remove the perpetrator from having any role in his tournament, and pause the tournament until it was resolved. Instead, the tournament proceeded with cis people playing as if nothing had happened. Some players, when told that trans players had been excluded, expressed approval or indifference. Kevin Stone never contacted the player who was harassed, or even attempted to find out who she was until someone specifically told him late in the evening.
Kevin relied on two trans women who would be running the next day's tournaments to offer a "compromise" to repair the tournament. As I understand it, they went above and beyond to try to find a compromise, then stormed out when Kevin Stone addressed a trans woman as "sir".
I was in a group of at least 10 players who boycotted the venue completely and made alternate plans for how to spend our vacation.
I know you've probably heard these concerns by now, and possibly delegated them to women, just like Kevin Stone tried to do. I greatly respect the work that the women's board does but I need to say: this is not just a "women's issue". This is a big problem of trans exclusion in open pinball and it should not fall entirely on women to solve it. It's not only important that trans women and adjacent people are welcome in women's pinball; it's important that all trans people are welcome in all of pinball, and the IFPA as a whole needs to step up.
I have already heard hedges such as "oh, but 17 hours of the tournament were fair enough" that suggest only small adjustments to the tournament. I have heard that we should let the tournament stand and quibble over its format. I have also heard that trans people should vote with their feet and go to a different tournament, which is the opposite of a resolution because it creates segregation in pinball.
There is a way to send a message that anti-trans hate is unacceptable, bathroom policing is unacceptable, letting it slide as a bystander is unacceptable, and segregation is not the answer: it is to remove all the points from the OBX Open tournament. No WPPR points for an anti-trans tournament.
Update: A supporting statement and timeline
One issue with using me as a primary account is that I never entered the venue (I wouldn't have been safe there). I was there for the discussion of what was happening and how to proceed, and for nearly every trans person and some allies ultimately leaving the site, but my account of what happened indoors is necessarily secondhand.
So here is another statement to the IFPA from someone who was inside the venue, who has said I can include it but prefers to not be credited.
Dear IFPA Staff and Board of Directors,
I am writing to formally document a serious incident that occurred at the OBX Flippers Arcade Fall Pinball Bash from 11/7/2025 to 11/9/2025 and to request that the IFPA immediately de-sanction this event and remove all associated ranking points. This incident involved discriminatory actions against a transgender player, inadequate response from the tournament director, and a failure to maintain the safe and inclusive environment that the IFPA’s gender inclusion policy requires.
Incident Summary
A transgender woman participating in the tournament was forcibly removed from the women’s restroom by the venue’s manager. When this discriminatory action was reported to Tournament Director Kevin Stone, he failed to take appropriate action to protect the victim, address the discrimination, or ensure player safety. Despite hours of community advocacy and intervention by the venue owner, the TD allowed the tournament to continue without addressing the harm caused or ensuring a safe environment for all participants.
Detailed Timeline of Events
11:11 AM - My wife and I arrived at the venue.
11:40 AM - My wife and the affected player registered for the event.
11:48 AM - Samantha Bacon approached my wife and me in visible distress. She reported that the venue’s manager had just forcibly removed a transgender woman from the women’s restroom. Samantha and a friend had been exiting the restroom when the incident occurred and witnessed the aftermath. The victim shared what had happened, and the manager openly confirmed her actions, stating she was proud of what she had done. The manager showed Samantha a tablet displaying an unfiled North Carolina state bill, falsely claiming it gave her authority to take such action. She further stated she would call the police on any transgender women using the women’s restroom and have them trespassed from the venue. Critically, Samantha informed the tournament director immediately, and he took no action.
11:52 AM - We went to find the victim to check on their wellbeing.
11:53 AM - En route to find the victim, I informed a founding member of our Triangle Belles & Chimes community about the incident.
11:55 AM - A group of community members gathered around the victim outside the venue to provide support and discuss next steps.
12:00 PM - Main event qualifying opens as planned.
12:03 PM - Members discussed legal options and the obstacles we faced in addressing this discrimination.
12:09 PM - Samantha informed the broader Triangle Belles & Chimes community about the incident and warned members to consider whether they felt safe attending. Several community members approached the TD directly, urging him to take action. He continued to do nothing.
12:29 PM - Kaylee Campbell contacted the venue owner, David Shields, to report the incident.
12:51 PM - The victim, after enduring nearly 90 minutes of trauma and inaction, left the venue and returned to their hotel.
1:02 PM - The venue owner affirmed that no one would be trespassed or have police called on them for using restrooms consistent with their gender identity. He stated the manager would be removed from the venue.
1:11 PM - The venue owner attempted to remove the manager from the premises. She refused to leave and threatened to quit. Notably, she remained stationed at the tournament registration desk, where all participants were required to submit their entry fees directly to her.
1:38 PM - A non-binary player attempted to withdraw and receive a refund due to the lack of action. The manager smirked throughout the interaction and appeared proud of her discriminatory actions. The TD pulled several of us aside, apologized, and claimed the manager would be gone within 90 minutes. The manager left the registration area for approximately 30 minutes.
2:00 PM - I began a scheduled scorekeeping volunteer shift for the tournament.
2:09 PM - The manager returned to the registration table. I immediately quit scorekeeping, refusing to continue while she remained on the premises.
2:14 PM - The manager left the room again. I resumed scorekeeping.
2:30 PM - Samantha and Kaylee met with TD Kevin. During this meeting, Kevin attempted to misrepresent the events and timeline to Kaylee.
2:39 PM - Our community group gathered outside to discuss the ongoing situation once Samantha and Kaylee returned. I quit scorekeeping to join them in solidarity.
3:15 PM - After more than three hours of active trauma, ongoing inaction by the TD, and the manager’s continued presence at the event, our group determined it was necessary to leave for our safety and wellbeing and to “vote with our feet.”
3:25 PM - Members of our group received refunds for their entry fees. The TD provided no apology or acknowledgment of the incident. During this process, he misgendered a transgender woman by addressing her as “sir.”
Ongoing Failures
The tournament continued throughout the remainder of the weekend. To our knowledge, the TD issued no public statement, no apology, and took no corrective action to address what had occurred or to ensure the safety of LGBTQ+ participants.
Why De-Sanctioning is Necessary
This incident represents a complete failure to uphold the IFPA’s stated commitment to inclusion and player safety. Specifically:
- The TD failed to act when discrimination was reported. Despite being informed immediately of the discriminatory removal of a player from a restroom, Kevin took no action for over three hours and only after extensive community pressure and intervention by the venue owner.
- The TD allowed a hostile environment to persist. The manager who committed the discriminatory act remained at the registration desk for hours, forcing players to interact with her to participate in the tournament.
- The TD misrepresented events to community members who were attempting to resolve the situation in apparent attempts to save face.
- The TD committed additional acts of discrimination by misgendering a transgender participant during the refund process.
- No accountability measures were taken. The tournament concluded without any public acknowledgment, apology, or corrective action by the TD.
This was not a women’s division event - this was a main/open tournament. Yet the handling and decision-making regarding this incident has been inappropriately delegated to the IFPA women’s board. This deflection fails to recognize that gender inclusion and player safety are fundamental responsibilities of all IFPA-sanctioned events, not issues to be siloed within women’s divisions.
The Opportunity for Leadership
While this incident caused significant harm, it presents an important teaching moment for the pinball community. I urge the IFPA to:
- Immediately de-sanction this tournament and remove all associated ranking points.
- Issue a public statement reaffirming the IFPA’s gender inclusion policy and making clear that tournament directors have an affirmative obligation to protect all players from discrimination.
- Establish clear protocols for TDs regarding how to respond to discrimination incidents, including immediate removal of offending parties and protection of victims.
The pinball community prides itself on being welcoming and inclusive. When discrimination occurs at sanctioned events and tournament directors fail to act, the IFPA has a responsibility to make clear that such failures are unacceptable. De-sanctioning this event sends an unequivocal message that player safety and dignity are non-negotiable requirements for IFPA recognition.
I am prepared to provide any additional information, testimony, or documentation needed to support this request. Multiple witnesses can corroborate this timeline, and I believe the victim would be willing to provide their own account if approached with appropriate sensitivity.
Thank you for your attention to this serious matter. I look forward to seeing the IFPA take decisive action to protect all members of our community.